It’s a sad truth: about a third of New-Year-Resolvers never make it past the end of their first month. Why is that?
Most of these resolutions fail because they’re the wrong resolution for us. A solution to the wrong problem, borne of asking the wrong questions. We resolve to change for others, before ourselves. We resolve to change, but are vague in our aims. We resolve to change, but make unrealistic plans. And we have the audacity to act surprised when, months later, nothing has really changed!
Humans aren’t great at setting goals. We tend to overestimate our future selves, underestimate our present selves, and get stuck in effort traps. And for the adults in the room, let’s face it: we don’t get much practice setting or achieving well-constructed goals, once we’re past our education. But, as in grade school, there’s still an acronym to assist us: SMART.
Your goals should be…
Specific
Measurable
Achievable
Relevant
Time-bound
As an example, let’s consider the most-universal resolution: weight loss.
Specific:
What’s a specific weight loss resolution look like? The first step here is getting past the “I want to lose weight” mindset. Ask the harder questions: How much weight? In what amount of time? By what means? “Five pounds, in one month, by cutting calories alone” is much different, in terms of effort, than “fifty pounds, in one year, by primarily sustainable means.”
Measurable:
In this case, Measurement is somewhat obvious. It’s directly linked to the specificity of your goal. And fitness goals, in particular, are easily measured. So, in this case, it might be more important to measure to the psychological aspects. Take a photo every Friday on your journey. You’ll have a valuable, visual representation of incremental change over time. That can be a powerful motivator.
Achievable:
Look: it’s good to dream big, and dream often. But when it comes to your New Year Resolution… don’t push it. Taking on too much too fast will leave you frustrated and defeated. These are not good emotions to carry into the new year, and not the best sentiments to provoke in the dead of Winter. In the example of weight loss, “achievable” can mean different things to different people. First and foremost, the quantity and time frame have to agree with physics. A human body can only lose about 1-2 lbs each week, before experiencing serious side effects. Then, there’s the long term. Consider someone who’s lost that 50 lbs in six months. A tremendous success, to be sure. But if they put 25 back on before the end of the year… how much does the original success matter? Consider the sustainability – “how long can I keep this up?” – when setting your goals.
Relevant:
Time for some soul-searching. Are you really pursuing this goal for the right reasons? Negative emotions are certainly a part of life, but think back to the point of decision. Did you choose this goal in a moment of anger, remorse, or self-loathing? Or, is it because are you’ve thought hard about the direction of your life? Changes born of emotion are as temporary as the emotion itself. And those goals do not last.
Time-Bound:
Goals without timetables are, essentially, unachievable. If you’re losing weight, you have to accept that it does not occur overnight. Again: a pound or two each week is the safe limit. You’ll need to break your original goal down: creating smaller, more-achievable, intermediate goals. Little victories that encourage gradual, regular progress. Small wins that teach us what it looks like to live with the new habit.
Will your resolution last until February? March?
Maybe, if you’re SMART.